Above And Beyond The Call Of Kitchen Table Duty

Ok, Here's what accumulated on and around my rather small, unassuming, uncomplaining kitchen table in a mere week's time;

-- A dust mask
-- 2 pairs of safety glasses
-- A whisk broom (new-- this could change our whole lives!)
-- A xeroxed picture of a giant spider (for identification purposes)
-- A jumbo 10,000 candle unit rechargeable flashlight (for the nightly cat round-up)
-- A can of "off"
-- My leather work gloves (they give me super powers-- ask Dan, my might increases tenfold!)
-- A draft of query that elicited the comment, "well, you never know what people will be into" from a friend (I revised it immediately)
-- 2 books on cd's, that my parents couldn't remember who the author was or what they were called, but thought were good.
-- 2 reusable trader joe's bags
-- Half a bread bag of old bottle caps from a friend (I want to cover my picnic table with them)
-- A "current" radio button from state fair
-- Some "math" (shudder) (mysterious numbers on scraps of notepaper)
-- An assortment of Menard's receipts
-- One of those weird round t.v. antennas (? I think this, the math, and the receipts were part of a "Dan-pile" that got engulfed by the larger "mega-pile")
-- A batik Indian bedspread (from the day I edited in my "branch office" -- the lawn chair)
-- My bike helmet (that's kind of where it lives)
-- My camelback (a backpack that you drink water out of when you bike, but come to think of it, would be awesome for margueritas too....If only I was still a semi-pro partier.)
-- Two bags of Doritos Dan was supposed to bring to work
-- A mystery bulb-- don't know if it's burned out or what
-- A shrink wrap dispenser
-- Another smaller flashlight (also for cat rounding up)
-- The fourth Stephanie Meyer book -- (AKA literary crack)
-- A mix cd for my sister and her rockin' kids (ting tings, duffy, hurricane, evil urges)
-- My niece's birthday gift (art supplies, nice ones, shhhh, don't tell)
-- Two bills-- oops, (not late yet-- whew)
-- A pen (something productive went on at some point when there was still exposed surface area)
-- My sunglasses (oh, that's where they went. Fortunately I have several back up pairs)
-- 5 pairs of shoes (on floor)
-- A crescent wrench
-- A cooler with 4 assorted beers (all different kinds) in it and 2 fake beers (for me) from a bonfire party sat night (woo! party down with those fake beers sue!)
-- One box of cat food

Quite amazing huh? I can hear you out there silently judging me. To me this isn't just a mess, it's evidence that I have a life. Judge away super clean people. (As if any of you would read this anyway) (I have a feeling slaghammer fans are more simpatico with me actually.)
Did you ever notice there are no "messy freaks" , only "clean freaks"? Hmmmm.