Sea Change

Hey people. I spent the weekend working on Tina, with a little break Sat morning helping out at the trail that is to be her home. This weekend it was all about the butt people-- Tina's butt, anyway.

I spent Sat afternoon working on her right thigh and working my way around to her backside. It's challenging because I have to keep shifting my thinking from 2D to 3D. In the frame-out process it's pretty easy. I kind of see whatever it is in 3D before I even start, so it's just a matter of caging that image.

But with this new method of covering the entire frame with steel, it's a bit of a trick figuring out how to take the flat pieces of steel and mold them to the shape. They aren't elastic, can't stretch. They generally only want to curve one direction, so if you think of someone's leg, which is roughly cylindrical, and how it attaches to their body at the butt-- that curve, you begin to see that people curve all kinds of ways.

To avoid a stove-pipey, robot appearance you have to cut all kinds of triangles and odd shapes you can work multi-directional curves and slight twists into. Since I'm doing all the bending by hand, usually just using a couple pairs of pliers and sometimes my trusty blue hammer, it's tricky-- and slow.

When I looked at her at the end of the day Sat it was a big disappointment because her butt was a little draggy. She had a little too much junk back there and I knew Sun the first part of the day would be spent cutting apart all the work I'd so meticulously done the day before.

It was worth it though. My working mantra is "I'm not going to all this trouble to have it turn out 'okay,'" -- or some version of-- if you're going to put in any effort, you're already buying in, so why not go for it? You might as well give it your all. That way, you have a shot at creating something really awesome-- special.

I'm going through another phase where my base metals are reconfiguring somehow. Every once in a while I have a major shift. I used to fight it, but now think it's just part of my journey and roll with it, as much as I can, and trust it'll lead me where ever I need to go.

The last time it happened was a couple years ago. I felt like a capped fire hydrant all the time. I needed to listen to music constantly. My earphones were like an umbilical cord, filling my ears with raw, heavy rock that felt like it was helping me vent off some of the steam.

I wrote constantly, and the theater in my brain ran movies every waking moment. It was so overpowering it sometimes made it hard to hang out with actual humans because I'd be distracted by the fictional characters in my head. I felt like my life would be totally pointless if I never got published.

Now something's changing again. I seem to have figured out how to manage the energy surges, which are less intense. Mountain biking, even just thinking about it or watching it, seems to have replaced the need for non-stop rock and that wild, hyper feeling (most of the time), and the writing? It's different.

I've detached from it, and that feels scary because I worry about not being able to "get back" to wonderland, but also important, like I can get perspective. I've written enough and read enough over the last couple of years to realize good writers are sort of a dime a dozen. The real trick is finding a story that holds up structurally-- and is different enough from everything else out there to feel fresh, and so needs to be told it's clawing its way out of you-- unstoppable.

Right now I have no such story, so am concentrating on my visual art, both technically and energetically, and letting things ferment, and reading as much as I can. I'm going to start listening to books on tape again too, after almost two years of taking a break from that and just jamming-out while I weld.

I'm monitoring my always fluctuating energy, and waiting to see what will happen next.

Life is pretty amazing isn't it?

Written In Reverse

Hey people. Symtomatic of my present mind-eff'd-ness, I had the hardest time picking out a song for today's Fav Music Fri. The process mirrored what's been going on with me creatively lately-- I had a few ideas, but when I looked up videos those bloomed into way more ideas, then I began thinking about it-- probably too much, and it just got more and more difficult to make a choice.

Then in the middle of the night I remembered this song, which hasn't been out that long, and it is PERFECT. Enjoy "Written In Reverse" by Spoon. (It's not really a vid, but listen anyway.)



It's so weird being sort of married to your work. When you're a creative, it's not just what you do, it's who you are, so how all that's going affects your moods and everything. Lately it's one of those phases where there's a lot of stuff roiling around building up pressure, but not being released in any gratifying way. ~frustrating~

With the writing-- it's easy to get into an almost masturbatory groove with it-- where it feels really good-- you're feeling that special alchemy of words from your head creating actual people and circumstances and it all sounds really good-- vivid. It's ON-- but then you see really it's not. It's just you playing with your tools, the words, messing around with a story that isn't really worth telling. And in this market-- the story is the thing that will sell your work.

If you are a writer and plan on holding onto your sanity (HA!), you are fated to walk a line between surrendering to the process, telling yourself that even if nothing ever happens with your work you'd still do it because you can't not do it, and trying to face reality-- it probably won't happen for you-- but it FOR SURE won't if your work is weak in any way.

So that's where I am. At this point I've written over 40k words of unpublishable crap (just for this one project), but it might be leading me to something through the back door of "well, I now know that approach doesn't work." Now I have to work on visual art. That's taking over my brain again, so I'm back to composing story lines in my head.

Is this a story that needs telling?
Why should anyone care what happens to this person?
What if all the major chunks of the story were shifted around so the reader had to figure out what this is a puzzle of?
How formative are events?
Can you win a war if you lose parts of yourself?

Gah. This story's written in reverse. Somebody call a hearse! The lighbulb's going off.
Here's how the sun woman came out. She's pretty cool, and I learned something important about expressions.

The welder awaits. Game on. Have a good weekend you guys.

And that, People, Is How To Drift...

Hey people. Here's a Video of one of the side events from a mountain bike race I checked-out yesterday at the trail. There was other cool hijinx going on too, that of course my camera battery died just in time for.

This is called the "Ice Burn-Out Competition". I was really surprised more people didn't step up, but oh well. Rich and Verlon kept us entertained for a while anyway. Verlon (red shorts) was ruled the *winnah*.



I have tons more pics and footage and am working on a longer more comprehensive video but it will take a few more days. I'll put it up when I get it done.

In other SueNews:

I now have 7 weeks until my next show. I finally checked the calendar-- Hmm, those things come in handy when planning stuff don't they? I've got ideas. That's a start. I just need to get my butt out there and weld.

Mostly I feel like writing right now because my WIP (work in progress) has taken a major u-turn. I had a neat little YA thriller all mapped-out-- I'd done and re-done my outline, and re-wrote the first 10k words 4 different times before starting totally from scratch.

I think the thing is-- I've never been into puzzles. You dump out all these pieces, and you already know they're all part of it-- they all fit some way and it will all make sense-- and you already know the picture on the box, so know what it's supposed to look like. Your success is virtually a lock right?

That is just way less interesting to me that wandering into some secluded, overgrown shed full of weird old crap and just digging around and seeing what happens.

So bottom line-- I'm letting the story just run out now (with a few very rough outline notes) and hoping by the end I'll have something publishable. So far it feels really mint. You never know-- maybe this will be the one. Maybe I've finally learned enough from the other 4 or so under the bed.

Kind of glad after the April 10th show my calendar is pretty clear except for a few commissions. I should be able to write a lot.

Hell of a Weird Wed discussion tuning-up. See ya then.

Shifting Gears

Hey people. I finished the last batch of tree sculptures yesterday (Thank God) and am delivering them today (Mon) to a gallery up north. So ends my "holiday push" for this year. I have a couple gifts to make, one personal, and one for a special client, a surprise gift, maybe-- if it turns out.

Prepare yourself, this post is going to be as rambling and jumbled as my brain is right now. Speaking of-- Oh- hey- here's the salad I made for Thanksgiving-- (you can click for a more delicious view)

It came about because my 95 year old grandma can't eat any greens. It's shredded carrots, sweet peas (raw), toasted almonds, pomegranate seeds, and raisins coated in cinnamon, ground cloves, ground ginger, nutmeg and sea salt. Dan says it's so awesome it should be on some cooking show.

I'm pretty happy to have stumbled on something healthy that I like because I'm going to be battling weight gain again for a while. The weather is making getting in regular rides at the trail impossible, and from here on out, if it's actually rideable, it will be frozen, & possibly covered with snow and ice, meaning IF I work up the guts to go at all, it will be at a snail's pace. Not exactly fat burning. To top it off, My leg is still messed up from my last spill, so I can only manage a plodding trudge that could be charitably described as a slow jog.

I need to really get on the eating sitch if I'm not going to be able to burn as much fuel off. Turns out-- if you slow down your activities, and eat primarily cold cereal, candy, and reduced-fat Chips Ahoy cookies, your AssFatAirBags deploy. Boo. Luckily, I now have that awesome salad in my arsenal. Yum.

Very excited about going down to visit Sis and the brood later this week. Isn't she adorable? I can't wait to hang-out, dork-out, laugh my butt off, and just kind of "be" in her space for a while. I really need to slow things down right now, take a beat.

I also can't wait to see my rockin' niece and nephew. Megan is eight now, I'm pretty sure-- anyway, every time I see her she's more grown up. We've always had this "thing", a big connection.

Everyone, even her mom, jokes about how she's like the kid Katie had for me-- my kid out of her body. Fine with me. Thanks sis-- way to take one for the team.

Me and the boy need to get to know each other better this trip. We share a music thing, and like each other, but we're different species so it's harder. Now that he's 5 1/2 I'm hoping the whole annoying toddler temper tantrum stage will be over and I'll be able to meet the human he's on his way to becoming.

I'm thinking about so much creative stuff right now. This is the time of year I plan, and try to rest, but when you do what I do it never really shuts off so it's more a matter of controlling the flow rate. I've been working really hard in the shop for a long time, and need a break from that, but I can't just not think about it at all or it will be March and I'll be behind already.

I have to decide how I want to approach the coming year, what kind of work I want to put out, what shows do I want to line up, what to tell people who want commissions-- when I'll work on those, who I want to partner with for selling-- galleries etc, will I do any public art? Big projects? That's all just simmering.

Writing-wise I'm eager to get back to writing, but this year need to approach that differently than I have in the past. I've learned SO much in the last few years writing novels. The main thing that resonates this week is that I can write-- I apparently have unfettered access to a whole cast of characters I can flesh-out quite handily, and can get into a groove of a voice and carry it along through a whole project. I'm basically a good writer who gets better the more I do it (like all artists), but I really need to get a handle on structure.

I've always begun with a basic idea and kind of rolled with it, usually making outlines as I go that morph as characters kind of go feral. I can really easily get into a flow of some tangent that appears and write tens of thousands of words that seem really good, but since I'm not really following a plotline, it gets pretty sloppy.

Kind of like this post.

Bla bla bla. Anyway, I'm letting the creative hose just kind of run into the stock tank right now and trying to figure out how to make the work I do this year be more "on purpose."

Also I have tons of ideas for a new non-fiction project unlike anything I've done before. I think I'll do it as a new, separate blog first to kind of test it out. Right now the working title is- "The Road To Ruin- Or- How To Be An Artist For Reals, Attitude, MFA, & Brooding Good Looks Optional." It will be really smart alecky, but also give tons of practical real world advice.

What do you guys think? About any of this?

Fav Music Fri- Thanksgiving wackness from MGMT

Hey people. Ho-my-God are you in for a treat today. I've been waiting to post this for MONTHS people. Feast your eyes on MGMT performing "kids" on french t.v. dressed as pilgrims. I've rarely seen anything so gloriously effing bizarre. It's not a mere video, it's a spectacle!

Stuff to notice-- the "Indians" are cuddling puppies. One of the pilgrims is getting a massage on stage. One of the pilgrims is randomly spinning around in the background on one of those gyroscopic deals you ride on that Pres Bush fell off once. And off to the right there is someone dressed totally as some Frenchie artiste, complete with beret and drapey smock, painting a portrait of them. Ah the French, gotta luv 'em.




In other Suenews:

Me and T-Pam have been riding a lot this week and getting bolder and better as we get in more runs. I'm now looking at stuff I dismissed as "impossible-- for me" in the beginning and thinking twice every time I walk it-- and even riding some of it. We've gotten our times for a whole lap to under an hour. Next year, when I'm finally able to stay on the bike the whole way through and ride every feature, it could really be effing ON. Maybe I'll race some more if I don't feel too stupid. That would be super cool.

Today I have to fire-up the damn tree factory, but yesterday I talked T-Pam into skipping with me and we hit IKEA and The Mall as promised. It was awesome. Cinnamon stix, milk duds, and lingonberry soda were consumed. I considered buying lamps at IKEA and fantasized about redoing our kitchen & bathroom someday. I took some rad pics I'll put up on Mon of the shoe expedition, and T Pam rolling around on a pile of cow skins like a barbarian. I got a kick-ass jacket for $42 at H&M. *Win*

Took a look at the novel I want to revise tonight (a stand alone). I charted each chapter as it now stands. Oh. My. Gawd.

I could have been sucked inside-out from the unbelievably huge vortex of suck. I wrote this one off the seat of my pants before I'd even heard of YA, or apparently structure, or how, you know, stuff is supposed to actually HAPPEN as opposed to the main character just talking on the phone about stuff. (wilts from shame) There's *some* good stuff, but TONS of garbage, and it's 20k too long. It should be fun to take another crack at after tree central shuts down.

That's it for now. Stay cool peeps.

Right About Now

I'm the funk soul brother, check it out now-- I'm the funk soul brother... Okay. I'm not, really. But I'm pretty sure my neighbor busted me jamming way out in my shop yesterday as he drove out of the driveway, and later, I think I scared off an elderly neighbor couple with my funktastic moves-- or it could have been the welding helmet.

Welcome to weird Wednesday people. Last week I went to Axman with art pals Linda & Jamie. That place never disappoints when it comes to weirdness. I'd recommend clicking on all these pics so you can read the signs. In this one Sly himself sings the praises of "soft like a lamb fabric scraps."

This was hanging from the ceiling right where you walk in. Who'd have guessed art geeks would blend so well with hardcore nerds? That's pretty much the population at this store.

In case you didn't know already-- geeks are hilarious. I used to try to get signs like these posted back when I worked retail, but they always got yanked.

You know what would be awesome though? If someone went gorilla and just put up a bunch of funny signs at some popular store they didn't even work at. Do it! I give you permission.

~Rip~ Here. Here's your permission slip. If you do this-- take pics. I'll post them.

Wow, I feel like I'm unleashing a smart-alecy army of pranksters.

*Sniff* This is a dream come true you guys.

Get your Huggy Jesus's while they're hot folks, although, as I've pointed out in the past, we really have no idea this isn't just some random old timey guy, or the dude from the Zigzag package or something.

I had to show you the robot baby bin again. It is just too creepy and bizarre.

I know some people who could use these for stocking stuffers with a card saying, "Use it on yourself D-bag." (That one's just for you Mary.) (*winks*)

I don't know about you but I'd buy one of these pens out of sheer terror of Dennis Leary alone.

When we were there I also scored some sweet valve-stem strobe lights for Penny-- in case I de-wuss next year and try some night rides. I will be *the fanciest* for sure. $2! Woo-hoo!

In other SueNews:

As you might have gathered I'm running primarily on tune-power at this point as I near the finish line. My show is Sat and I've been cranking in high gear for months now. Last month's gallery show kind of swept me clean of "actual art", and I'm too burned-out to effectively tap that well at the moment, so I spent all month making stuff I know has sold in the past-- trees, deer, cats, jewelry. Now all my work rides on one day. Hopefully people will show up and buy. You can check out more about that over on the art blog tomorrow if you want.

Writing has been totally on hold, but Mr. Bigtimeagent told me Fri he's still reviewing my manuscript, so I should hold-off on my revision ideas for now. Yesterday it was announced he's transferring to L.A. to open a west coast division of their agency. That's big, and will either mean this is great for me because he's in a much more powerful position if he decided to sign me, or that I'm too small a fry and he'll cut me loose. We'll have to see.

That's it for today peeps-- the welder awaits. Remember I'm always taking submissions for Weird Wed-- Keep those eyes disturbingly peeled. Later.

Hey people. Today's Fav Music Fri is value-packed. I love it when art, music, and writing collide. As I've been telling you, I'm still frantically making art for my next show, but my brain is rapidly sliding into revisionland. This makes things like little hooks-- snippets of stories, catch my attention.

I've been hearing some Elvis Costello lately on The Current (One of the last decent music stations out there btw.) (And they have a new website, AND they stream...) A couple of songs have really grown on me. Check out this cool excerpt of "Complicated Shadows" below-- I love the mood, the inferences. It totally makes me want to know more. It's very much like the vibe of my stories.



Here's another I really like-- "Sulphur to Sugarcane." It's not the whole song which is sassy and sultry and cool as hell, but take a look at this clip.



These vids were both produced by Blip Boutique who used artist Takashi Kawashima. Can you imagine how cool a book trailer with the right music would be? For those non-writey types out there, book trailers are becoming huge. They're a great marketing tool, especially for YA (my genre). What better way to get buzz going on a teen book than a viral video? If I ever get to this point and actually have a budget, I'll be checking out places like Blip Boutique. (They are not boring- as you can see for yourself.)



This next one isn't connected to them (apparently). I couldn't find any information about who the director/artist involved was but it remains one of my fav's, and since Halloween is coming up again I thought I'd repost it. Enjoy "Walking With A Ghost" by the White Stripes, (original song by Tegan & Sara.)



Erm.. Okay- I guess it tells you who the director is right in the beginning of the vid. Hello! (Hey, no caffeine yet.) Again very in sync with all the stories rolling around in my head, about ghosts and intrigue, plus another great example of that cool silhouette style..

Today I'll once again be welding away out in my shop, jamming-out and trying to untangle about four plot lines. I have three weeks until my next show. After that I want to make a final pre-holiday push to get some stuff out to the galleries, but then am really looking forward to taking about three or four weeks and just writing my ass off.

Weird Wed-- They're BaAack.....

Hey people. It's all about the disembodied heads today. Check out this one, "EEEP! I have sky blue eyeshadow on and no hands with which to scrub it off!"

And this was actually in a locked glass display case. Just in case someone wants to steal the one eyed, decapitated doll head. Or the legless tiny doll next to it. Or the other partially dismembered naked doll behind it...

Even without bodies they project arrogance. YOU ARE NOT BETTER THAN US BITCHES! You're only HEADS!

Pouty-lipped emo boy and his twelve year old girlfriend. "People just don't get us."

"We, the committee, have ruled against you. You are not austere enough, and have no fancy hat. Be gone, peasant."

She was the only one who looked kind of fun-- like she maybe has a pistol in her handbag. But oh-- yeah, no hands. Nevermind.

"Just so you all know, I'm the *fanciest*." Her hair is actually kind of cute.

This isn't technically a head, but she had to go somewhere. First of all-- transgender? You tell me. Next there is the "Oh yeah-- I'm SO working it" posture, but what you can't see-- is that she has purple nail polish on, and it looks like she's making us check it out. Saucy.

When I was a kid I came up with a comic book character who was a wig head salesman by day. His briefcase was shaped like a head, and his car was full of heads. I got so caught up in that aspect of it I failed to give him any super powers, and nothing really interesting ever happened, besides head related misunderstandings. So you can see, I've always been incredibly strange.

In other SueNews:

My brain is being hijacked by writing stuff this week. It's like the writer in me has stomped into the art studio in my brain and swept all the paints and stuff off the tables and begun spreading out all kinds of complicated maps and talking a mile a minute about stuff I'm not quite following.

I'm convinced this is one thing that eff'd my ride up sun. (btw- I had so many more bruises the next day it wasn't even funny. I guess my little over the bars deal did do a little damage after all. Nothing serious though.) I can run and let stuff unreel in my head, but I can't ride like that. I'm not good enough yet. I have to think about my ride the whole time.

The timing on this could be better because I can't really dig in to any writing stuff until next month, but maybe by then things will have cooked down to something cohesive. In the meantime-- art to be made!

Time To Pretend

I'm feelin' rough, I'm feelin' raw, I'm in the prime of my life...
Hey people.
MGMT is a group that has grown on me. Their music has this almost calliope-ish, galloping forward momentum, and a sense of humor too. In today's Fav Music Fri pic, "Time To Pretend" they send up the rock lifestyle-- "Let's make some music, make some money, find some models for wives."

I love how their videos show one of my own fantasies-- little "lost tribe" imaginary worlds. Shirtless cherubic rockstars drumming, surfing psychedelic rainbows, frolicking with the lost boys and girls and riding cats! It's like someone's imagination exploded onto the screen. What's not to love?!



Here's a "making of" video that's kind of interesting too.



In other SueNews:

Got back to biking the trail in the last couple days. Man, do I suck now! Oh well. That's what happens when you take a couple weeks off. Got to get back on it. Yesterday went better than the day before. I haven't completely lost it, but I know I'm way slower. Still very fun to be back in the woods which are mind blowingly beautiful now.

Art is still the main focus right now. I have another show in a month, but it's not a gallery show, so slightly less pressure in terms of the work itself, but I need to come up with salable things, smaller, gifty stuff. So it's still pretty labor intensive.

Writing-- I've been getting really positive reactions to my queries and 1st chapter so have a few fulls out there. One really cool agent wrote back a 2 page letter laying out all the pro's and con's of the manuscript as it stands, suggesting revisions. I may go that way-- it would involve a complete overhaul, breaking my one & 3/4 current manuscripts into a trilogy, but I've had my own reservations about the plot/s as they stand and think if I went at it again I could shore tings up significantly. We'll see. There are still some really good agents reading what I have.

That's it for now. Have a good weekend!

More MN State Fair weirdness...

Well, I have to say this year's fine arts exhibit at the MN State fair wasn't the disturbia spectacular last year's was. Here's me and my pal Linda getting gothic. She's trying to be in character. I'm just hoping the lady taking our picture can figure out my camera.

Last year there were siamese twin sock monkeys feeding themselves into a meat grinder.

And a rainbow rhinestone covered nekkid body-- take that prudishness, in technicolor!

And perhaps not surprisingly, my favorite-- babies by the gallon.

This isn't to say these were my favorite pieces of art, but my favorite weird art. I find plenty of plain old amazing and beautiful art there every year, and of course some things that make me wonder how they got in, art being purely subjective. This year's offering was what I'd call very "safe" though. Nothing in your face or that outrageous-- so, the seed art exhibit held way on the far side of the fair in the horticulture building will have to pinch hit. (click pics to enlarge)

This person submitted a bad seed baby last year. I like the kitty better.

Really quite good, and totally unexpected subject matter.
Way to go off the reservation Elizabeth!

I hope someone sent this to Conan...

I love the guy at the bottom-- "HELLO!"

And my fave-- taking something immediately familiar and giving it a twist.
Nice Skippy. Nice

But Alan Carpenter of Mpls takes first place in my heart for his "Self portrait with first ladies." Linda noticed it seems the inexplicable monkey on Laura Bush's shoulder is copping a feel (?). Alan himself seems to be radiating messiah-like rays of divinity. WTH Alan? WTH? What would be even more hilarious is if this is actually made by someone just pulling a prank on Alan Carpenter, not by him at all. Hmm. Kind of gives one ideas doesn't it?


In other SueNews:

I'm hitting the querying trail again after like, idk-- about a year? Funny thing is, all this time has given me better perspective. My previous query letter su-hucked. I was way to close to the story and characters. Also when I'm going through the manuscript now-- which was beyond perfection when I last looked-- I see it too has a bit of suck that needs to be cleaned out. Funny how that works.

For my next novel I'm checking out Sun Tzu's 2500 year old book (yep-- super ancient) "The Art of War" for research. I can't wait to take a do-over on my YA stalker story. I have a completely different idea of how to approach it now.

In bikey stuff-- riding the trail continues to improve. It's all incremental in my case, but I'm still treating every ride as a learning experience. I'm trying to improve my time too. I ride it now in about an hour. I'd love to knock 10 or 15 minutes off of that by cleaning up my tech skills and getting smoother, and, you know, getting better and more gutsy.

Trusty Pam and I have picked our team name for the Mpls Urban Assault Ride at the end of the month-- "Finger Twist Of Doom." Our outfits will be red and black. (kind of punk-ass) More to come. Stay tuned.

Breakable breakable girls and boys

Hey people. Thinking about lots of creative stuff today- characters, visual art, life etc.

On the writing front- well, technically I haven't been on the front lines much lately. I revised that whole manuscript, began a sequel (a couple different times), began revising another ms, all the while kind of back burnering the whole thing, waiting to hear from AgentCoolAssChicka.

I was going with- "I did the work. I put it out there. I'm waiting to hear. It's out of my hands."-- and in the meantime finances dictated that I get in higher gear with my visual art career. (The only one I'm getting paid for so far.)

Well, It's been 6 months, and I'm sick of waiting. I think it's time I moved on. This little hiatus from writing, while weird, I think has been good. I was SO invested in that ms and those characters. I really got into a "clap if you want Tinkerbell to live" mentality where it just seemed like everything rode on it.

Now after all these months I've detached a bit and realize that alchemy to create real characters is in ME. There will be other characters I fall in love with, other stories that feel like they need telling. This isn't to say I'm abandoning that project-- I still think it's a decent novel, but I think now I'll be able to move on to brand new things without being distracted by those ghosts.

I need to get back to writing every single day though. And to start querying again.

The temporary lag in my writing has been good for my art too. Before I was so immersed in the writing-- even having dreams about the characters and story lines-- that I felt a little disconnected from the art, like I was making myself do it.

Now it's kind of talking to me again. People who don't do art might not get this but there are times when you're doing it and yeah, you're doing it- bending the steel, welding etc, but there's something else going on too. All these thoughts go through your head about what you're working with, like as the piece takes shape it's trying to teach you something that's about more than "pretty", something bigger. At those times you begin to work more fluidly, trying not to question or hesitate too much. It feels like the art is just flowing through you from somewhere else.

I know, sounds nutty and new age-y, but that's how it feels. The art that results is more spontaneous and has a certain quality people pick up on and respond to.

Someday I'd love to find a balance, where I feel equally plugged in to both the writing and the art, and both just kind of pour out and are well received.

Hey, it could happen. ;)

Jack White has a new ba- BLAM! (head exploded)

Jack White of White Stripes and Raconteurs fame now has a third band called The Dead Weather. They've actually been up and running for a while but their album was released this week so here ya go. Enjoy "Hang You Up From The Heavens."



I am so jealous of Allison Mosshart the lead singer. She's from The Kills. (Look! She has that rockstar coat I wanted last winter!

Jack White is probably my absolute favorite musician. He has very broad taste (word is he's working on an album of Hank Williams music with T-bone Burnett). He is uber talented and follows his creativity wherever it takes him. Working with him must be a dream, but mostly I'm jealous because she gets to be in a band and here's why:

*You get to wear strange clothes yet still be considered "cool"

*You get to collab with other artists

*You get to hang out with a bunch of oddball dudes who treat you like their sister and don't want/expect anything else from you (this is my fantasy, don't wreck it)

*Rocking-out is part of your job

OK. That's enough drooling over rock bands for one post. I know most of you guys aren't big headbangers anyway. (Sighs.)

In other SueNews:

Novel three, which was a sequel to novel two-- the one I'm trying to get published right now- has been temporarily shelved. I'm practically done with it, but have so many changes in mind for the revision it'll be largely rewritten.

This seems to be a pattern with me. I used to hear how it takes most authors a year to write a book and I'd be like, "Why? -- I write pretty fast." Yeah, but I seem to need to write about three times as much as winds-up in the finished product.

Anyway, I started rewriting my first novel and can't stop thinking about that so have to get it out of my system. First novels always suck and mine is no exception, but the story is good, so I'm starting from scratch. I've learned so much about story structure etc in the last five years and my writing is way much better-- er... betterer? -- whatever. (yes, that's a joke) Anyway, I know I can write a better novel this time around.

Artwise I'm working on individual garden gates made out of old screens, and have ideas for a bunch of smaller wall pieces. Also I'm thinking about how to take my sculptures of women to the next level-- better faces completely covered with steel as opposed to the wire covered framework. Ideas are rolling around, even though the market is pretty dang discouraging right now.

Fortunately I can distract myself with MOUNTAIN BIKING!
That's right you lucky people, it's another mountain biking update!

Last week I went on a ride with both Trusty Pam AND Dan and those guys both had incidents. TPam went semi over the bars twice into rocks, the second time doing this to her leg.



Believe it or not, it looked worse the next time I saw her and all the bruises came up. Dan winged a tree and has a scrape on his arm, and caught a stump with his toe (the same one I did once). When the bike stops fast, you don't. Nuff' said. I of course was completely unscathed. I guess I ride more cautiously. I'm getting faster, but only because I'm now comfortable zooming through sections I've slow poked through numerous times. I need to feel how my weight shifts and find my favorite line etc before I start speeding up.

My goal with riding is to #1 have fun, #2 not get hurt, and #3- be still riding trails when I'm in my 80's and 90's. We'll see. I'd love it if people have to eventually stop and rub their eyes when I zoom by-- "Was that an actual old lady?"

Yesterday I got as close to the experience I'm jealous of all the guy riders for as I ever have. When T Pam and I arrived at the trail there was a lone girl in the lot assembling her bike. I cruised right on over to say "Hi" and "Go chick riders". She was actually about our age, waiting for her hubs to show up, and we rode together for a while. It was so fun feeling like a little tribe caravaning through the woods. I really am jealous of the guys, how they automatically get the hang factor.

I really feel like a kid over there. There's something magic about flying over the little humps of dirt on the trail, even with my "Driving Miss Daisy" style of riding. I've gone from being terrified of certain features, like the swoopy bowl, to riding them, to riding them without brakes, to trying to turn sharper and push the front end down into the descents. The giant banked curve which was the sight of my first ever wipe-out took me a while to get up the guts to ride, but now I zoom down hooting and whooping dorkily every time. There is even one spot I can get air if i want without having to master the whole wheelie/timing thing.

The trail we ride is the best in the metro (if not the state). Yeah I said it. Here's CoolTrailBossRich talking about it and showing off some of his suprstar skillz.



That segment of trail shown is an advanced feature I of course never have ridden (and maybe never will). He and the Hillsiders don't follow the official rulebook of trail building (yeah, there really is one I guess) and go off the reservation building more radical jumps than usually allowed and running sections straight down hills that get washed out and gnarly-- more fun to them.

Gee- is it any wonder I'm so drawn to this with a rogue trail and a bunch of rule breakers running the place right in my backyard?

Tonight me and Dan are hitting it again. I'm SO glad Dan is into this too. He approaches everything he does like he's an indestructible fifteen year old kid. (He runs up and down ladders like they're stairs, facing out on the way down, even carrying stuff.) I'm a little worried he'll get broken some way, he is past his warranty, but he's having so much fun. Hopefully he'll stay in one piece. (Crosses fingers) At least I have a couple people now to zoom around with.

Well, this was super long. If you're still reading-- way to hang in there. Look for pics Mon from a floatilla party we're having on the river tomorrow which I will be attending as the fabulous and mysterious Madame Soucie. Hopefully people will get nutty. Have a good weekend. Remember to spread those vibes of awesomeness-- have fun!

EDIT TO ADD:
Dan drove me nuts tonight trying to be a superstar on his third ride EVER, riding the teeter totter, expert loop even though one jump was enough to mellow him out a little there, and going over his bars trying to ride some curved ramp deal. This put me in worrying about him mode instead of just riding and having fun mode, plus the trail lords decided to toughen up a section I had just mastered making it an automatic walk for me. (This is just part of it- riding over there. They want it to be super challenging even for elite riders. I was just already pretty crabby by then.)

Not a good date ride, but, at least after we hashed it out. I go over there to feel like a kid, not a mom. Dan's agreed to reign in the stunt show a little until he learns what he's doing at least, and I'll have to just learn to quit projecting horrific possible injuries on him and relax a little.

So- Is This Anything?

Looking for some feedback in the art department people. What do you think of old chain link gates made into garden gates-- with colorful steel flowers added, and maybe other artistic touches, maybe holders for potted annuals etc? They could be an actual gate or could just be stuck in the garden or whatever.

Is this a cute idea or is it just me? (Really-- tell me. I don't want to waste my time right now.)

Another idea would maybe be using old screens and somehow making those into gates... (?)

Or old picket fence sections--? I'm thinking undercoated with one color, and top coated with another, roughed up, and then having metal flowers etc worked into the design. Bluebird blue over marigold comes to mind. (???)

Here are some flowers I've been working on.

Originally my idea was to make the entire gate, and that could stick, but then I saw all these old gates at the occasional sales and they seemed kind of nostalgic and kitschy. Anyone care to weigh in?

I've been in a creative slump lately. Big stuff isn't selling right now, and that's kind of what I'm in the mood to make. I've taken so much time off, no matter which way I go right now, I'll have to work my way back in. Work begets work. Fake it 'til you make it. It's like when you turn the hose on and it takes a while for the water to come out. The gates idea could be fun to fool with, but I sort of feel like making a big horse, or, stubbornly (hmm- moi?) more of those formidable female guardian figures that no one buys.

On the writing front-- a popular agent blogger did a post this week about how writers shouldn't self-identify as "writers", saying, "unless you're being paid, what you have is basically a hobby." It literally gave me a chest pain when I read that line. It felt very dismissive and like a slam.

But I have to say something has shifted in me lately. Not too long ago I told a few confidants that if nothing ever happened with the writing I would consider my whole life to be a failure. Talk about laying your cards on the table. I felt like through sheer force of will, and working my ass off at it, I could somehow "make" something happen. Cause some kind of universal wave form or something.

Call it selling-out, burn-out, or plain old battle fatigue, but now I've gone more into "if you're not enjoying yourself TODAY you're doing it wrong" mode. This is not to say I'm done writing. I do enjoy it, even when it gets consuming-- which it always does once I get into it, but I guess I feel like I've released it a bit. It's not the only yardstick by which I'll measure my life anymore.

I suppose this is healthy, even though part of me is reluctant to let that fighter part quit. I don't know. That doesn't seem right either, because I'm not quitting, and I'm not giving up, but I guess I feel guilty for letting some of my zealousness mellow-out about it.

Any writers out there read that post of Nathan's, or have any reaction about this?

"Now We Can See"

PUSH PAUSE-- SORRY, THIS VID JUST PLAYS WHEN OPENED. COULDN'T FIGURE OUT HOW TO FIX.

Hey People. This is a bonus packed Fav Music Fri so even you rock scardy's should stick around. First up-- the pick of the week-- The Thermals "Now We Can See." This is a catchy tune sure, but I love the punk influence, plus-- they have a girl in the band (I'm so jealous!) The real reason this appealed to me right away though is that it weirdly reminded me of this art exhibit I was in once that paired artists with writers--

--But I'm getting ahead of my self, first check out The Thermals. (Go on, jump around a little, I know you want to.) In case the vid iz broeken-- here is a link.

Awesome huh? There's something about "Our enemies lay dead on the ground and still we kick" that's guiltily gratifying. Plus, I love how he can't really dance. At all. But it doesn't stop him from totally jamming out and getting into it. The intense earnestness also sells me. Adorableness. (pets)

OK-- back to that art exhibit. The idea behind the show was to assign writer's to artist's entries in the show. The writer's were to write something inspired by, about, related to, whatever-- the piece being shown. The amazing Catherine Holm was assigned to me and her piece blew me away. Boom-- head exploded.

I was into making kind of abstract, totem-y pieces, and the art part of my brain is somehow disconnected from the articulate part of my brain. I know what that stuff means inside, but usually can't explain it. Somehow Catherine tapped into that and just got it and created this--

Totemsongs / Heartsongs
By Catherine Holm

Earth of our origins in the palm of my hand. Bring me back to my beginning. I want to feel my feet splayed in the wet soil as the roots of trees. I want my fingers to tremble as aspen leaves in a westerly wind. I am the whisper of big cats, the roar of a predator, the search of an eagle. I am the smell of rotted twigs. I am the silent sound of dry larch needles falling to the ground and ushering in the barren cold. The wind cannot catch me. I am the Earth.

In the beginning there was dirt. And the dirt was good.
We rose from the dirt, first I, then you when i became too lonely with the words and stories that began to tumble about in my head. Stories fed stories and we grew and spun ideas and inventions and progress that sped onward and we glutted ourselves until we could consume no more and destroyed everything in our path and crashed and rotted and ended and began again.

In the beginning there was dirt. And the dirt was good.
We rose from the dirt, first i then you when I became too lonely with the words and the stories that began to tumble about in my head. Stories fed stories and we grew and spun ideas and inventions and progress that sped onward and onward. The containers that held our hearts grew too small as our hearts throbbed with the messages of some ancient and future song that we could not quite understand, yet understood completely.

Our hearts exploded, released from their now-useless cages with the keys we carried. And we became something new, more than human, more than animal, more than Earth. We ride the spirit world, we are the universe, we see the truth with the clear vision of a crystal eye, we hold the secrets of the heart.

Every time I read it it gives me this weird tug in my chest, like something calling me. Amazing huh? Her website is really cool so go look. She's a writer but also does life coaching. Very cool lady.

In other SueNews:
What a difference a 15 mph winds at your back make as opposed to 15 mph winds in your face. Trusty Pam and I completely pummeled our 14.5 mile paddle yesterday. We did the whole thing in 2 hours, and really could have done it even faster. I had plenty left in the tank when we were done so Sat I'm excited to really go for it. As Pam likes to say, it "paddled the bitchy right out of me."

After, we went to McD's for cones, and let's just say never go to the Big Lake McD's if you want a cone-- they suck at cones, but somehow our stupid, melty, completely inept cones and my disproportionate rage about this caused us to completely lose our shit and laugh hysterically for at least ten minutes, after which we were even more exhausted. Whew-- laughing your ass off is SO good for you.

So-- this post long enough for you? Have a good weekend peeps. Try to laugh your butt off at some point. Later.

Fash-on.

Today was interrupted by a dentist appointment. I hate going to the dentist. Hate. Hate. But my hygienist is really nice, so I at least show up now. I have this weird thing where complete strangers-- or brand new friends-- will tell me their deepest most personal stuff. It's always been that way. Maybe I was a therapist in another life. The first time I went to this gal for a cleaning I hadn't been in there more than ten minutes before she was balling her eyes out telling me all her troubles with her hands stuffed inside my mouth. Anyway, my appointment kind of messed with my flow today but otherwise I was pretty productive.

Here's the raven and where I'm planning on putting him.

And Jez's outfit got a bit more couture today. I decided to go with oak leaves for the ruffly skirt under her topcoat. (you can click pic for a better look) These took a while to cut, but I like it.

I thought I was two days out, but it might be two as of today. Hands are hard and will probably take a whole day, and I want to make her headdress more elaborate, and I still have parts of the coat to finish off. I can totally see the finished product in my head now though. I think she'll be really pretty awesome when done. A-game!

As for writery stuff-- Betas have all weighed in and have given their stamps of approval. I can't believe how helpful these people were. Two are more writing centric, and are both SO SMART. What one wouldn't catch the other would and both had absolutely amazing suggestions. The other isn't into writing at all-- which is great to get that perspective, but is kind of an unofficial expert in paranormal stuff. Since my story revolves around ghosts getting her input and validation was really awesome.

Now I'm proof reading my revision so there might be another couple of double shifts yet, but then I resubmit to AgentCoolAssChicka. Presumably I'll be too busy totally freaking out about the show to go into obsessive email checking mode at that point which is probably good.