Fav Music Fri- Thanksgiving wackness from MGMT

Hey people. Ho-my-God are you in for a treat today. I've been waiting to post this for MONTHS people. Feast your eyes on MGMT performing "kids" on french t.v. dressed as pilgrims. I've rarely seen anything so gloriously effing bizarre. It's not a mere video, it's a spectacle!

Stuff to notice-- the "Indians" are cuddling puppies. One of the pilgrims is getting a massage on stage. One of the pilgrims is randomly spinning around in the background on one of those gyroscopic deals you ride on that Pres Bush fell off once. And off to the right there is someone dressed totally as some Frenchie artiste, complete with beret and drapey smock, painting a portrait of them. Ah the French, gotta luv 'em.




In other Suenews:

Me and T-Pam have been riding a lot this week and getting bolder and better as we get in more runs. I'm now looking at stuff I dismissed as "impossible-- for me" in the beginning and thinking twice every time I walk it-- and even riding some of it. We've gotten our times for a whole lap to under an hour. Next year, when I'm finally able to stay on the bike the whole way through and ride every feature, it could really be effing ON. Maybe I'll race some more if I don't feel too stupid. That would be super cool.

Today I have to fire-up the damn tree factory, but yesterday I talked T-Pam into skipping with me and we hit IKEA and The Mall as promised. It was awesome. Cinnamon stix, milk duds, and lingonberry soda were consumed. I considered buying lamps at IKEA and fantasized about redoing our kitchen & bathroom someday. I took some rad pics I'll put up on Mon of the shoe expedition, and T Pam rolling around on a pile of cow skins like a barbarian. I got a kick-ass jacket for $42 at H&M. *Win*

Took a look at the novel I want to revise tonight (a stand alone). I charted each chapter as it now stands. Oh. My. Gawd.

I could have been sucked inside-out from the unbelievably huge vortex of suck. I wrote this one off the seat of my pants before I'd even heard of YA, or apparently structure, or how, you know, stuff is supposed to actually HAPPEN as opposed to the main character just talking on the phone about stuff. (wilts from shame) There's *some* good stuff, but TONS of garbage, and it's 20k too long. It should be fun to take another crack at after tree central shuts down.

That's it for now. Stay cool peeps.

Weird Effing Wed- creepy dolls & pseudoprofanity edition

Hey people. Buckle-up is all I can say today. If you are new or squeamish, this post might be a bit much for you. You've been warned. For the rest of you freaks-- here are your creepy dolls. ~tosses at the internets~

Yes-- I'm freaking terrified here. Who wouldn't be of antebellum debutante zombie doll with her motorcycle-ride hairdo. If you look close her little hands are reaching and grasping, ready to entangle themselves in hair, clothing, whatever she can grab. Run!

Yeah, here we go. This appears to be some kind of human trafficking container that has busted open to reveal either Pocahontas, or some woman nabbed from a mountain bike race, Bigfoot, some poor thing who has just given birth to E.T., a giant Edith Bunker, and a fembot.

Is it just me or are there shades of Twilight here? Some super pale boy in clothes from another century looking on, (probably seething with murderous rage), as "Bella", (apparently down from another swoon-fest), is ravaged by a delighted were-skunk, while his pack of were-Cavalier King Charles Spaniels looks on disapprovingly.

Raggedy Andy and his mail order bride. Local women proved too uppity for him, and, you know, thought he was hideous, so he paid $10k for Svetlana. She can't believe her good fortune. Now she is able to live in America-- Land of milk and honey, and clean this guy's house and do his laundry-- and him, and maybe get a part time job at a fast food restaurant someday! (This is almost a true story you guys... That's all I can say about that.)

One clown is crying and the other is screaming in terror as the Easter Bunny pulls his hair & lays the hammer down. First rule of the Easter Bunny's all clown fight club-- You DO NOT talk about Easter Bunny's all clown fight club.

Okay peeps. The rest of this post is probably going to be salted liberally with pseudo & actual profanity, so, if that bothers you, now would be a good time to tune out. Bottom line is I have to make a shit-load more of the effing, effing, S.O.B-ing- Imeanbeeyoutiful trees.

Look at these gorgeous m-effers. I know. I like them too. But I tell you I am SICK TO DEATH of making them!

Yes, it is at my discretion. I could just say, "Nope, sorry-- I'm out," like I have other years. But here's the thing. They sell really well, and times are not just hard for artists (and, er... everyone else) right now, but also for gallery owners. They could make some sure $ off these, and I could use it too, even if I'm only making about half through them, so I feel like I need to suck it up and make about 4 effing dozen more!

The thought sickens me. I was so planning to be "off" by now, spending long hours writing and revising, and screwing off. So far that hasn't happened. I've had a couple days off (literally, like, 2) but otherwise have been still working on art stuff all month. Now that I figured out last night I have to go into full-on tree mode again-- I'm pissed and stressed. I could only sleep for about 5 hours because I kept doing the math in my head-- "Seriously-- I have to make how many??" My wrath, is totally fucking incurred man.

I'm so sick of tasting metal dust in my throat, and soot settling in all my pours and etching the lines on my face-- speaking of-- lines on my face? That is a fucking OUTRAGE too. I only feel, like, fifteen or 30 (depending on the day). I look in the mirror and it's like-- "gasp-- who the eff is that?" I'm tired of my hands hurting and the plates of my skull grinding together when my helmet gets heavy, and coughing all the time and my windpipe getting pasted shut, and my eyes burning.

I'm going to take tomorrow off for some retail therapy, then hit it again straight through until Thanksgiving and hope I can get them all done in one mass session. (which would be a new record to say the least)

Tomorrow I'm going to IKEA, land of all things cool and cheap and seductive for the home, and the Mall Of America-- land of everything, including Auntie Anne's Cinnamon pretzel sticks.

If I find some hot-ass velvet pants or cords in a color I can't resist it could be ON. If I find a cool military/"I'm with the band" black jacket to go with my new fuck-yeah equestrian-ish boots it could so be on. But it probably won't be.

Remember the fierce coat I super wanted (above)? Couldn't bring myself to do it. The purple cords I super wanted? I couldn't pull the trigger until they were on sale for $12 at H&M and came with a free sweater.

This "spree" will probably end much like my annual state fair pig-out mission, where I go there with every intention of completely debasing myself and having to be carted out in a wheelbarrow, only to eat a walleye sandwich and half and order of cheese curds before wussing-out.

I just do not have it in me to be a total spend-thirft gross American consumer, but I'm going to skip-out tomorrow, and not do a lick of work, and consider buying a bunch of shit I don't need, and try to feel all decadent.

Scattering Sue

Hey people. This week I'm tying up loose ends with the art stuff-- packing things up for galleries, seeing if I'll need to cram in another production week. I hope not at this point. I'm pretty fried. I have a weird repair weld/engineering job to do for another artist tomorrow, helping to shore-up a crumbling sculpture she has going. I'm going to try to talk her into starting over first. It sounds like one of those putting your finger in the dyke projects where it will just continue to break along whatever new weak point is created by the repair. The initial structure wasn't made strong enough to support its weight. Hmmm. Metaphorical huh?

I'm all jumbled today. I have to get organized for gallery deliveries, but all I really want to do right now is grab the hard rake and go into the woods and fart around in my streams, unclog little dams that have built-up etc-- play in the woods and the mud and water.

I'm riding later, first with Dangergirljr and then with Tpam. Yesterday we rode and it kicked my total ass. I was totally spent 3/4 of the way through, had no energy, couldn't breath right, rode like crap and felt like I was having a heart attack or something. So weird. Am hoping today I'm more back to normal. Sometimes I wonder if I've really screwed-up my lungs from breathing all the metal dust etc in my shop, but then I tell myself to just keep doing stuff I like, that your cells keep regenerating anyway. You're probably better off if you just go along like you are healthy and stay out of the medical system if you can help it.

There is some fun stuff I have planned with friends and family in the next few weeks, and I'm both anxious and nervous to get back at my writing. I'm having the capped hydrant feeling with the story ideas, but it feels pretty chaotic and will probably take writing a ton of crap to begin making heads or tails of it and getting anything decent out.

Also I've been thinking about other ways to get some income going. I have the art thing, but no one's paying me to write so far, and the art wipes me out physically. I can't go at it full time all the time. It would be nice to find some other side thing. I've been tossing ideas around. Like I said, feeling kind of scattered today, but that's just my process I guess.

Any of you guys have any ideas? What do you fantasize about being able to make $ at?

Humor, Hooks & Heavy Guitars

Hey people. That's the way a local reviewer described Weezer- today's pic for Fav Music Fri. She went on to say, "They haven't reinvented the wheel here, but would you really want Weezer to do that?" No-- you'd want them to just rock-out with the fun music they always put out.

Their new album dropped this week- "Ratitude" (named by Dwight from The Office, a friend of the band's frontman Rivers Cuomo) (one of their promotions for it is that you can but a Weezer Snuggie in red or blue) and I've been waiting for the video for the first single to be released. Enjoy "If you're wondering if I want you to, I want you to" by Weezer.



A lot of people who listened to Weezer in high school or college claim to be "over" them. They came along later for me and I still really get into them. It's just fun power-poppy music. Rivers has stated his ambition is to write American pop music. He doesn't see that as anything to be ashamed of. Pop = popular, relatable. He wants to write music people jam-out to and sing along with that is accessible. I'm calling it a win.

I still love stomping around singing "I am the greatest man who ever lived" and I love it when I'm riding and "Everybody get dangerous" comes on. Go Weezer!

In other SueNews:
I decided to do one more show before dealing stuff out to galleries so today I'm setting up for an open house/show at my neighbor's studio. This also means I'll be making jewelry today and tonight. I have to say, I really like how the "Fast Machine" jewelry has been coming out, and much to my delight-- the people who were drawn to it last weekend were exactly the kind of people I had in mind-- cool, active, and kind of kick-ass.

My calf sprain is healing-up. It hasn't been affecting my riding too much, but last night I tried running and it was definitely "there", making me shorten my stride quite a bit, but, do-able. This morning before I dive into another workday, I'm going riding with DangerGirlJr T-Rose, that girl I took out on her second ride. We may ride the whole course, have to see what she's up for.

I can't believe this week is already gone. A couple more play dates next week, but hopefully, lots more writing happening.

Weird Wed Grab Bag Edition

Hey people. Sorry, no creepy doll pics today. Digging into the reader submission bag, and exploring freaky dreams again.

First up is something a couple different people have sent me. A website called PEOPLE OF WALMART. This has some funny commentary, but frankly depresses the shit out of me. Seeing these obese, scantily and/or horridly clad individuals-- who you know if you've ever been to a Walmart walk no faster than .0001 miles per hour, and probably have enough snack food stuck in the crevices of their bodies to feed a kindergarten class-- makes me loose faith in humanity.

Keep in mind these people are out there driving around, and maybe even voting. God, maybe democracy isn't such a hot idea after all. Good lord-- they are most likely rampantly breeding too! If you must check it out, because it is pretty funny, be sure to be near some kind of eyewash station, or maybe have some cyanide tablets on you.

This other link is courtesy of Slagporter Beth. It's a site called Jesus Is With You Always , which I'm sure had no intention of portraying him as creepy stalker, but... See for yourself.

Because I just don't feel right baggin' on a lot of people's personal savior, in this instance, let's just call him "a random hippy" and see how that changes the flavor of these pics.

A random hippy emerges from the sleeping compartment of the trucker's cab and whispers, "Don't look in the rear view mirror, just get off at the next exit... Don't try anything funny, because I'm --"


A random hippy sneaks up behind this poorly trained welder, (who for some reason has opted to not use his protective helmet to do this job) and just as they're both blinded for life, grabs the guy by the shoulders and whacks his noggin into the machine yelling "I'm--
Just as Mr. T is about to ask Pugsley on a date, a random hippy wanders up and says, "Watch this guys--" and mimics someone taking a giant poo. As they stare in slack-jawed wonder, he gives them a thumbs-up and grinning maniacally says, "I'm--

When Mr. Badassbiker-- whose clothing appears to be about to burst off his porky body, and seems to be wearing some kind of fancy loafers-- stops at a stop sign, a random hippy jumps out of the bushes and starts directing him to his "crib," where he claims to have "some righteous chronic". He says, "I can hook you up dude, because I'm

If you want to see more, hit that link. The clown one is pretty funny too.

So-- freaky dreams-- my latest I remember were from last week, but one was nothing but wet sand would come out of my welder, and I had to keep cleaning out the inside corner of this little box I was trying to weld, and I'd try again, and more wet sand would fill it in. I got really pissed and just plunged in holding down the trigger even though it wasn't working like, "Oh yeah? Take it hard bitch." But it did no good of course.

The other one was I was some teenaged guy, and Amy Pohler and some other woman had broken in and were kidnapping some little kid. I managed to escape because they didn't know I was there. Once outside my mode was to totally go on attack rather than negotiate. I remember thinking, "This is stupid," but also going, "But, I'm a teenaged dude-- I have NO impulse control-- AARRGGGG" I went after them with this pcv potato gun thing-- some thing you had to hold on your shoulder like a rocket launcher, but only a potato came out of it. ~Fail.~ Amy had an actual gun and meant business. I had to retreat behind some cars. Never did find out how it turned out.

So, any weird ones you guys want to share??? Or offer analysis of mine? Come on. I know you've had 'em. Comment it up.

I'm the boss of me

Hey people. Wooooooooo Hooooooooooo! Is all I can say this morning. For the first time in months I slept in this morning-- until almost nine!-- and don't have a big deadline looming over my head. It's gorgeous out. Thank you universe! I'm going to clean and do laundry today, which normally I'd complain about big time, but it will actually feel good to get things a little more under control around here. I'll just blast the tunes and go with it. Later Trusty Pam is ditching out early so we can hit the trail.

Speaking of-- I'm giving Pam a point for this...

She figured out the first rule of riding berms- don't ride off the top of them. This is the gnarliest bruise I've ever seen on a mammal- or anything really. She got dirt on her helmet too but was luckily okay.

Remember when this--

Turned into this? --

Back then the mere thought of falling off my bike, like, onto the ground was totally horrifying. I remember asking Cooltrailbossrich about injuries once, before I got a bike, and he was like, "Yeah, I usually break a bone a year," then listed a bunch of his former wounds-- "collar bone a bunch of times, once my whole leg fell off, decapitated once, etc etc" (okay, that might be exaggerated a little, but I was like-- gasp!)

My road bike feels lots taller and I still don't like the idea of falling off either bike, but having disembarked a bunch of times now... I don't know. It's weird. One second you're whizzing along, the next you're on the ground-- boom. Then half a second later you're scrambling back up and possibly grabbing your knee or girlnads or whatever hurts but within seconds you're going, "No, I'm okay," then you're back up and riding again and usually it really is no big deal.

I'm always trying to convince people to try this (mountain biking), but the risk is a major deterrent. Last week when I went in to have my knee checked-out Young Doctor Handsome was rather appalled at my skinned-up, bruised knee. He goes, "This is a pretty bad looking injury." I was like, "Really? This is kind of nothing. I'm just here to see if it will mess anything up if I go ride in a couple hours." He looked at me weird. I just grinned and secretly thought he was probably kind of a wuss.

He said he'd bought a mountain bike from his friend but he's been afraid to go ride it because of the injury potential. It's hard to explain to people who haven't done it. Falling comes with the territory sure, but if you're careful you can minimize the risk. Usually it's no big deal, kind of like when you fell down doing stuff when you were a kid. Fear of falling is worse than the actual spill.

Anyway-- Thanks universe, for giving me another great week of riding weather. I'm considering trying it in the snow this winter, on only the super easy part. We'll see.

As for the rest of the week-- riding and spending time with family and friends I've blown-off for months will be the mode. Really psyched!!

Is there anything you do that you love, and is hard to explain to those around you?

Let's put a little mojo on this sucker...

Hey people. Well, My show is tomorrow. Today is the load-in, later in the afternoon. Until then I'll be continuing to make jewelry like a mofo. This new "line" I've been working on is called "Fast Machine", in honor of adventurous, strong, kick-ass women everywhere.

The basic ingredients are: bike gears, birds, red/green/amber beads, & watch parts.

I'm pretty cheap. There aren't too many things I look at and think are worth the money-- or I may see the value, but it's just not worth it to me to have whatever it is.

But I really like these- the whole vibe behind them. I'm going to charge $40 for the necklaces, and $20 for the bracelets. I know it isn't cheap, but those are decent gift price points, and like I said-- I'd buy them. And I don't say that much, even about my own stuff.

Remember Flo Jo? How awesome was she? (Very)

As far as my own zoomy awesomeness goes-- not very at the moment. I was riding this really no-brainer part of the trail, a flat part I usually use to get some speed up and I guess I got too close to the edge and clipped a root or something because it was like someone stuck a stick through my spokes.

Long story short, the bike stopped fast, I didn't, and sprained my gastroc (which is this calf muscle that goes into the back of your knee) when I hyperextended going over. Essentially it feels like my knee is super messed-up, but it's not serious. It just will suck for a little while and makes me ride shitty (er) now until I can put all my weight on it.

So-- Bla bla bla. You guys feeling me on the new jewelry or am I high? Do you think the pricing sounds okay? Tell me now. Sunday is too late. Heck, tomorrow morning is too late. Sound off!

I didn't forget it's Fav Music Fri btw. Today's pick flies in the face of my usual thinking, but it's a fun song and I'm using it to put the whammy on tomorrow. When you work all month for a one day pay-out, well, let's just say mama is going to be kind of pissed if it tanks. I've done everything I can do about it-- including busting out the mojo. (blows on hands and rubs them)

Groove-out to the Flying Lizards' "Money" and send me some prosperity vibes y'all. If you're a local-- check out the show if you've got time. Deets over on the art blog.