BOING

Spring sprung today yo. Everyone in MN is pretty much busting out the shorts and motorcycles-- it got past 60 I believe. You haven't seen people go cocoabananas over spring until you've seen Canadian border states hit 60 for the first time in 5 months.

Oh-- here's how the hair came out. (I know you've been dying to find out!) I told Dan this is as much of a blue haired old lady as I ever plan to be. Trusty Pam and I have already planned how we're going to trick out our walkers-- if it ever comes to that-- with flame jobs and bells etc.

We took the bikes out for their maiden voyages of the season today. Now try, TRY not to be jealous--- oh I know-- ridiculoso! How could you NOT be envious? My bike is made of 98% awesome!! I think my hula girl is due for a makeover though. At least a facial and maybe a new skirt.

Bell = cool.

Yeah I said it. (They didn't have the right spellin'.) BTW like a girl = awesomely. We went about 15 miles and averaged about 20mph (top speed was 24.5). Not bad for the first ride in months. Biking is one of the only things I can do full blast. When I run I can't run flat out because I'll either wipe-out or my dumb tibia will start hurting again. But on the bike I can pretty much heart attack it and it is the best feeling. I have to hold myself back from flying along making dorky hooting and whooping noises. And going " WEE!"

Jez is coming right along. I'm about 2 days out I'd say.

So someone reminded me tomorrow is St. Patrick's Day. This used to be HUGE for me, right behind Halloween & New Years. The last time I really hit it was the most wild and most fun P'day ever. Me and my wild gal pal of the time went down to St. Paul to this super rowdy biker bar. She lived in a, not kidding, haunted house over by Lex and Grand, so we just walked all over town hitting bars, but Ryan's was our ultimate destination.

It was crai-zee. I was wearing some kind of Robin Hoody get-up that involved black thigh high boots-- but flat-- not slutty high heels (more buckaneerish). Have to be ready for action you know. (Plus, not a ho yo.) It was packed. People were running all over. People were walking along the tops of booths and on top of the tabletops, and setting the streamers on fire. On the dance floor it was a total slam-fest. Everyone was just grabbing everyone else and throwing them around. Fights, major mayhem ensued. My head was almost exploding. I kept looking at my friend, probably with my eyes half bugging out and going-- YES!

As I recall the next morning, not quite as much of a crazy fun-fest, but it was kind of worth it. One of my very last totally nutso fun times. Have fun for me nutballs. Have a shamrock shake or whatever. I'll be working, then biking again. WOOT!

Boob Job

Last night I went to bed before midnight for the first time all week and cra-hashed. Slept for 9 hours straight. Today I'm giving myself a recovery day-- half day of welding, little light run, vegging out-tonight.

Kind of felt like the sistah-hood took a hit on this one, but I gave Jez a boob job yesterday. It was just with her placid expression, small frame, and pretty meh chestal region she was beginning to look a little Asian, (art-wise). I needed to take her a little more brick house. So, check out the new girls. Not gross, not porno big, just, biggER.

And Sunday I got the river on her. I'm psyched about the leaves now, and had another idea of adding a raven. I have a thing for ravens. They're cool, smart, live super long, and mate for life. In my story when Jez bites it she calls ravens down to scavenge her remains so she can become part of the natural world again. This is probably weird and freaky, but to me it's kind of cool. Anyway, I think she's going to get a raven on her right shoulder.

Sat morning I delivered that birch commission to the VeryNiceUnitarianWisconsinites. These guys waited two years almost. Talk about being a loser on deadlines (but I did have some unexpected shop-not-getting-built-in-time, back-going-out, leg-bone-cracking complications). These guys are super cool, and really support art and artists. It was fun seeing them again and visiting other artwork they've bought from me over the years. Karen made these awesome cinnamon rolls for us--yum!

They insisted I pose by it too, so here's my Vana White impersonation.

On the way to their place we passed another of the many "humiliating episodes from Sue's life" historical sites scattered around the TC area. Maybe someday there'll be some kind of a tour with markers and wayside rests and everything...

Back in the day I always drove crap cars around. The fuel pump on my ancient Pontiac Sunbird went out on 694. This car became know as the "Daisy Duke Mobile" because eventually the doors broke too and I had to crawl in and out the window. Amazingly I got good enough at this that I could even do it in a skirt and maintain my cool. (Just let me keep thinking that okay?)

So I'm on 694, stranded (pre cell days), and start walking. There are tons of cars beeping at me because I was like, 20 & had really long hair, & am a girl. I was wearing my usual-- black tee shirt, and my baggy red and black plaid shorts (and of course loads of black eyeliner). This was about as punk-ass an outfit as my employer back then would let me get away with.

I decided the exit was too far down. Naturally undeterred by a six foot chain link fence, I climb on up. Cars are still beeping and stuff and I want to get off the road asap. When I climb over the top, my shorts catch on the chain link, but I don't notice in time, so when I go to jump down I become stuck in mid air. I'm now hanging, by my shorts, six feet off the ground next to a busy freeway at rush hour. I kicked at the fence and flailed around until they finally ripped and I fell down, tumbling into the weedy ditch.

Thank god this was pre-cells, pre-youtube.

Tonight I'm putting a blue streak in my hair, and not doing another damn thing. Later.

Pwnation Alert

Hey people. I began the day by bombing down a hill that scared the crap out of me the first time I saw it. It's over in the advanced section of the ski trails Trusty Pam and I frequent. As we approached there was a "most difficult" black diamond, then a little ways further a yellow "Caution" sign. Just as we rounded the bend a girl screamed the whole way down. We looked at each other. Gulp.
I've downhill ski'd plenty, but x-country is different. Your heels aren't connected, just the toes, so you have less control, plus, the trail is only like six feet wide and is cut through a forest, so there's trees all over. You can't turn and stuff like you would to control your speed slalom skiing. Also, for a long time my second-hand bindings didn't match my second-hand shoes and my skis would pop off the minute I put any side pressure on them. Not good.
Pam always takes more spectacular tumbles than me, and has face planted on this thing a couple of times. I've fallen once or twice, but am usually riding the breaks so hard I make it. We ski'd it last night, and all night I was like, "I should just run that thing."
So today I did. Man it felt good.

Then I went home and pwned the hell out of my story. The End. (Woot!)

All I have to do is sweep it for little editorial mistakes and send it to betas again, but I think it's ready now. (Pumped!)
Tomorrow I have a delivery/installation early over in WI, then will proceed to hopefully pwn Jezebel, and maybe go running. I'm pretty hyper right now. Weeeeeeee!

Eye Candy

OK, It took me all morning to cut apart and re do yesterday's mess, but this is more like it. The clothes throw me. I get how bodies are constructed but when you start putting a bunch of clothes on them and it's all just in my head with nothing to look at I get messed up-- not that I go around picturing people naked all the time or anything-- much.

In my head and in the story Jezebel wears 1850's high buck hooker gear, bastardized with native american influences she picked up living with the Fox tribe. I can't make layers of lace and gauzy stuff etc out of steel. She also wears a gun and has a huge hole blown through her chest but, y'know, probably a bit of a stretch for the art crowd. So this is Jez, and not. I'm taking her more woodland spirit. So what IS she wearing-- what's she made of?

To me she's made of her environment-- the forest and the river. I'm going to cover her whole outfit with leaves and water.

This steel is so gorgeous. It's one of my very favorite parts of my job, but i can only do it on the summer now because I have to lay the steel out and get paint all over, plus, I use a hose to mist the paint. I do layers of paint and rust-- white vinegar usually for that, more paint, mist, vinegar, paint. I use metallic paints and the rusting oxidizes whatever they use for the sparkle in the paint. I love how it looks. I always hate to cut it up, but it will make awesome river water.

Here's some leaves. After seeing how that birch commission came out I really like stems on the leaves. It makes them look more lacy.

As far as writery stuff, was up super late last night and it's going to be another late one tonight. I'll probably see where I am about midnight and if there's no hope of finishing I'll -- reschedule my submission date (I just typed "give up" about four times and deleted it-- crap, I HATE missing deadlines). It's not like this was even an actual deadline. I'm the one who said "I'll probably have it for you in a couple weeks", but I feel like now I look unreliable. I guess as long as it's effing kick ass awesome when I turn it in. That's what's important.

OK, this doesn't count as "work", so, better get at it. Stay cool.

EDIT TO ADD;
Eff, Eff, Eff. It's 11:30 and I can tell by what I've got left it is not going to happen tonight-- plus, I'm so tired I've entered the suck zone. When you start throwing shit, using tons of profanity, and not just for fun, and/or stop being picky-- time for a break. Bed yo. In the morning I have an early ski date, then may pwn this effer (the manuscript) just so I can at least feed it to willing betas on my deadline day. Stay tuned-- I know-- this is totally riveting!!!! (meh)

Jezebel Birdsong

OK. It's 2 "A" dot fricking "M" people. I'm 35,000 words in on my revision and the manuscript is up to 78,000 total now and counting. Think I can finish by Fri?? D'ya think???? The good news is most of the end doesn't need any work, it's just getting through this middle part.


As far as weldy stuff goes-- "They call me Hell, they call me Staceeeeeeey...That's not my name." This is Jezebel Birdsong-- one of my characters, a ghost. This is with just the warpaint.

Now with her bandit mask she's starting to look a little wrestle-mania.

OK, now we're talking. Now I'm really feelin' her. I think she's surpassed my lame drawing-- thank God!

Stuff coworkers would have endured today-- frequent air guitar breaks using whatever was handy, usually the welding gun, head whipping episodes resembling seizures-- or maybe me being shaken like a ragdoll by an invisible giant, me stomping around singing "I am the greatest man that ever lived" (yeah I said it) super loud, and "Monkey Wrench" and busting out my awesome terrible dance moves.

In truth none of that would have occurred if I had coworkers because I would have felt too stupid to totally rock-out in front of them. Instead I would have, with great effort, restrained myself, and tried to mentally block them out, and been mad at them for unwittingly oppressing me and my rockingness. --- Or, more likely, I would have tried to corrupt them into being all goofy with me and no work would have gotten done.

See? I'm way better off on my own.

Getting there. Shoulders and arms are still off.
Hopefully tomorrow will be a pwnfest.

Weird Wed-- The Double Shift Version

Hey everyone. I know, it's not your problem I've decided to totally revise my whole novel a mere week before I told AgentCoolAssChicka I'd resubmit it. And it's not your problem I've only got-- holy crap (just checked calendar) 3 &1/2 weeks until my show-- But that's where it is people. Gah!

You'll just have to take my word for it I have plenty of disturbia waiting for you in the bull pen, but for today here's just a little preview.

As indicated by "Little mister sunshine", I did not invent this whole doll weirdness thing. I'm merely a chronicler of it.

Sorry this post is so lame, but I'm already late for work. It's so sad when the children have to suffer. Sniff. Try to soldier on until I have more time for you.

Butter Face

Hey peeps. Blew another glove today.

Here's the fix. Creepily I'm the Ed Gein of gloves.

My drawings aren't always very good, but they give me the idea. It's not so much that I'm trying to make the sculpture look like the sketch, as it is a way of helping me work it out in my head. It's kind of like my inability to talk tech-- I know what I mean, I just can't tell you.

So anyway, this is a character from my novel. She's a ghost, and probably looks weird to everyone but me, but I think she's pretty rockin' (in my head at least). Picture a good looking black woman wearing a headdress with a bunch of weird trinkets hanging from it, and antlers sticking out of the top, wearing war paint and a bandit mask. Yes, my head is a scary amazing place at times. What can I say? In my head she's way hotter than this lame drawing, but, like I said, it just helps me work it out.
When I do people I now start with the face. I can do bodies no problem-- my main flaw being a tendency to make everyone vaguely super-heroic, at least the naked ones. But with people they really need a good face. It doesn't matter how cool you make the body- positioning, idea, whatever-- if when you're all done it has butter face. (nice-- but-her-face...)

I doubt I could make a face look like an actual person at this stage of the game, like "do a sculpture of my sister" etc, but I can usually make the people in my head. So far so good. For women you basically want symmetry, high cheekbones, big eyes but not Disney big, then other stuff like ethnicity comes into play.

This was a whole 8 hour day-- no lunch (and those who know me know how crabby I am by now) but I did get her face all done today. I got eyes on her too, just didn't shoot it (no pic).

OK, second shift begins now. The manuscript is a scary, scary mess. I have highlighting all over the place and have cut out 6 chapters-- about 12,000 words, and am busily rewriting the remaining 73,000 words. It should weigh in at around 75 - 80 when I'm done.

When I hit the wall I'm going to hit hard, and it better be after my show! -- Oh, thought I was done. This is basically me being weird. I wanted to see if I had the scale about right and if where I was planning on putting the eyes would work. I'm actually this blurry today. Not a camera thing. : ) Ok-- writey time!