Where is my mind?

Hey people. Today's Fav Music Fri pick is "Where is my mind?" by The Pixies-- because that's the tune I set my last race video to. It actually fits me this week too. Remember on "Twilight Zone- The Movie" when that monkey thing is sitting on the wing of the plane pulling wires out? That's been my brain. Anyway-- enjoy. The answers from the last post follow the vid.

If you click the button with the 4 arrows it expands to full screen, Press "esc" to go back to small & see blog again.



Are any of these true? Are any lies?

1) Despite my chronic skipping, I got very good grades in school, often making the honor role.

Not exactly true. I did skip a lot, did not get good grades-- although I got good grades considering. I also tested really well on college entrance exams, in everything except math.

2) When I was young and my address was (briefly) a mustard yellow pinto wagon, I hung out with a real live timber wolf for nearly a week.

This, believe it or not, is true. Someone had brought the wolf to the vet I worked for to be euthanized because her son, the owner, had killed himself. I just couldn't let it happen and the vet gave her to me. Later the lady changed her mind and wanted her back. I wish there had been a wolf sanctuary back then.

3) I once had a stalker who looked exactly like the actor Bruce Dern. In fact, I'd be very interested to know Mr. Dern's whereabouts from July 1983 to February 1984.

True.

4) I once appeared on a high school quiz show. My area of expertise was astronomy.

True. In Canada in 7th grade, where you began going to high school in 7th grade at the time. There was no Jr. High.

5) I went to the Sturgis motorcycle rally with hubs once completely by accident.

True. And once was def enough.

6) Friends know me as an awesome dancer. I no longer go to bars, but at weddings I love when I get get someone else to dance with me and the floor clears so we can really show off. Hubs hates to dance but I love it.

Apparently a lot of you know me well enough to know this is NOT true, although I have to say at the last couple of weddings I've gotten out there and have not made a complete spectacle of myself.

7) I have nearly drowned 3 times. Twice in the ocean, once in the Apple River in WI. In WI I was saved by a strange boy's crotch.

True.

8) One time, (not one of the near drowning experiences), I swam so far out in the ocean the floor dropped away and out of sight. When I looked behind me towards the beach I set-out from, the island looked small and very far away. On the way back I swam over two sharks fighting over something.

True. There was also a big storm coming in from the ocean. Me and Dan had to swim for all we were worth to get back to shore before it hit. Kind of thought we'd had it that time.

9) I'm an excellent cook, when pressed into service, even though I have ruined a number of pots and pans and even disabled a major appliance in my efforts.

True.

10) I drove all the way to Texas once (from MN), commando, on a dare.

Not true. It was only from Galveston to Mustang Island TX, and wasn't a dare. Me and sis had gone swimming in our clothes and had nothing really dry to wear. Commando was more comfortable than wet and sandy. This was the trip we learned to stop elevators between floors to use as changing rooms (before vid surveillance) and if you're going to stay in cheap motels-- bring Lysol and "shower shoes."

11) I once found a dead body. I was eleven years old. Me and a friend used to hang out in this big area behind our townhouses that was all fields and woods. One day we saw a guy sitting in the grass leaning against a tree. After spying on him for a while, we decided he was sleeping and made a game of seeing how close we could get to him. He wasn't sleeping. He'd shot himself in the head.

This is not true, but is exactly the kind of thing we used to pretend/hope for when I was that age. Lurking around in the woods and fields creeping myself-out was my favorite pastime.

12) A family of complete strangers once took refuge in my living room from a knife wielding mugger in the middle of the night. I awoke to them moving my furniture around looking for places to hide.

This, is true. They were being stuck-up for a frozen turkey. The mugger was in the alley across the street having it out with the husband. I never locked my doors, even though I lived in the total hood. I had nothing to steal and there was a big window in my front door that wouldn't keep anyone out anyway. I figured I was saving myself a possible broken window. This was the only time anyone ever "broke in."

13) I have a secret thing for sundresses. If I could get away with it, I'd wear one everyday, for a few hours at least. I also have a collection of pretty fancy high heels I never wear out in public. I just can't resist shoes. They're like crack! It doesn't matter if I can walk in them or not. I must have them!

Trick question-- true on the sundresses, false on the shoes, which leaves me with a bunch of sundresses I can only wear with my old standby flip-flops or one or two pairs of sandals. I like to wear dresses, but then wish someone would play tag or get in a big watergun fight with me or something. Remember when you were a little kid and you'd wear a sundress and just play like it was normal clothes? That's what I'd like.

14) I once had a job that required me to wear a white lab coat.

True. It had the name Barb embroidered on it, but true. It was when I was a vet peon.

15) Have rescued toads, frogs, salamanders and spiders with my bare hands, but am freak-a-zilla-ishly terrified of snakes. Once, when co workers decided it would be funny to toss a rubber snake at me, I reacted by throwing my big gulp all over them. It did turn out to be funny, but not in the way they expected.

True.

16) Once when a duck flew down our chimney I captured it with my bare hands and set it free. Not before toppling a potted plant and a ceramic horse my great grandma gave me, and the duck shitting all over the house unfortunately.

False. Me and Dan were inexplicably afraid of the duck and called our outdoorsman next door neighbor to come capture it for us, and nothing broke. There was some duck poo though.

17) In high school I went into the bathroom one day and cut a whole bunch of my hair off.

True. It came out a lot better than you'd think. Everyone thought it was super cute and wanted to know where I got it done. It felt very empowering.

18) I was once in an elevator with Jerry Seinfeld. I wanted to say something funny SO BADLY. When he pushed the lobby button I burst-out, "Don't bring me down, no-no, no-no, no-no, no-no, no-no, nooooo. Oh-wee hoo," in this kind of dorky robot-y voice. He just shifted uncomfortably and avoided eye contact while I died a silent death.

This is just totally made up. In real life I'd probably just give him a smile and congratulate myself on not being an intrusive pest. But I'd still wish I could think of something funny to say.

Thanks for guessing everyone. I guess Pam got the best score (4 out of 5), but a lot of you were pretty accurate with the one or two you did guess. Lynn- you did pretty good too. :)

Check back Mon to see if I manage to pull off a blog makeover I'm planning, if I can figure out the html stuff.